Lumps in My Heart
by Finn-the-animal
Summary: Adventure Time story featuring a cute romance between LSP and Finn. Nothing here Rule 34. Lots of adventure, some hurt comfort. Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

Lumps in my Heart

ADVENTURE TIME fanfic by CannibalCupcakes

I thought I'd write a fic shipping Finn with LSP, partly because I don't think I've seem much LumpyFinn, and after thinking about LSP's vision in the Hall of Mirrors in Gotcha! I'm sure she really loves him. LSP is 15, and obviously despite her brash exterior has family hang-ups and is a very insecure and lonely young lady. Finn is innocent and pure and has a heart of gold, I don't like seeing him hurt by Peebles or Fire Princess, but I really love Lumpy, and I think Finn should too! Not that it should turn out a 'Happy Ever After' or anything like that. Please comment!

It had been less than a week since Jake had moved out of the tree fort. Lady's puppycorns would be due soon and Jake was anxious about her wellbeing. Jake knew Finn was cool and would be supportive, but he was a little worried about leaving his 14 year old bro all on his own for a long time. Still as long as there were always monsters to be slain, it couldn't be forever. At this time though, his girlfriend needed him most.

Jake stretched a long reassuring arm around Finn's shoulders.  
'So Finn, dude, I'm gonna spend some time with Lady. You're cool with that bro?'  
'Sure brother.' Finn hugged him back, 'be there for Lady, I understand. I'm old enough to look after myself don't you worry.  
'OK Finn, you need anything just call me bro'.  
'No worries dude.'  
Then Jake was gone.

For the first couple of nights, Finn stayed in with Beemo, playing video games and watching movies he's dug up from the rubbish tip. Then, on the third night the nightmares began.

Finn heard thunder. Then he saw the Lich, illuminated by flashes of lightning. The Lich was leering at him across the void, draped in the flayed skin of the great Hero Billy. The skin was peeling off to reveal horns and sunken eyes in a rotted out skull. The skull wore an old and dirty white hat, with tiny pricked bear ears he found unnerving. Then he realised the skin the Lich was wearing was his own. He was older, scarred, musclebound and battle hardened. The Lich was tearing flesh away from bone, releasing oil and green vapour, the green vapour manifesting into a long bulky, slimy body of a worm, a King Worm...

Finn sat bolt upright, restrained by his sleeping bag, screamed out.  
'Aaaaaaaarrgghh! JAKE!  
Then he fell on the floor.  
'Get off the bed worms!'

When he regained his senses, he realised there were no worms. Beemo came running, her a concerned expression on her pale blue screen and red on light glowing in the darkness.

Finn picked up a lighter and lit the candle by his bed.  
'You have dream malfunction Finn?'  
'Yea. Dream malfunction.'  
'You need to be reset Finn.'  
'I can't do that Beemo. Just make me some cocoa. I'm cool'.

When Beemo return, s/he found Finn staring blankly, lost in his own thoughts. Beemo being a video games console was not good at reading human emotions. S/he had been around Finn and Jake long enough to know though, that Finn was unhappy. She could tell by the way the great hero sighed deeply and seemed distracted. S/he sat and watched him.  
'Who wants to play video games?!' Beemo broke the silence, with a big grin on her screen, shaking Finn from his heavy funk.  
'Yeah. Thanks Beemo.' He picked up her controller and submerged himself in several rounds of Tetris, clearing his mind as he cleared each line of blocks.  
As the blocks piled up, faster than he could rearrange them, Finn's game was over.  
'Oh bumslops.' He cursed throwing down the control pad in disgust. But he felt better.

Finn finally picked up the jam jar of cold cocoa and took a seat on the rug next to her.  
Beemo smiled and purred. 'Beemo make you better.'  
Finn was grateful for her company. When he realised he was safe and he had only had a bad dream, he managed to make it back to bed.

When he woke in the morning, to an enchanting smell from the kitchen, Beemo was singing 'Making Bacon Pancakes' in her cute little Japanese voice, and making bacon pancakes as s/he had seen Jake do. S/he plopped a steaming pancake onto a plate and presented it to Finn, proud of her creation. He prodded it with a plastic spork.

Glob. He missed Jake. The last time they had been separated, it was when Finn had become obsessed over the 'little people'. Jake had fled to Lady Rainicorn's while he played with the hearts and emotions of their little counterparts. That time, Finn hadn't noticed how the time went. He hadn't washed or cleaned up for weeks, and hadn't eaten properly or even dressed himself. He was completely absorbed by the Magic Man's enchanted creations. This time it was different. Without distraction and obsession, Finn began to feel an aching void inside, which he needed Jake's bro-ship to fill.

So should he call Jake? He glanced at the mobile phone Jake had left for him, a hefty brick held together with gaffer tape, fully charged and saw it was programmed with Lady Rainicorn's number and the number of Jake's camera phone. Finn wanted to hear Jake's gravelly voice on the end call him homie and make everything OK.  
No, he thought, remembering Joshua's dungeon. 'Cry Baby Finn'. He had only had a nightmare, nothing worth worrying his brother about. Joshua had worried about Finn for his own good. Finn being a rare species, possibly even the last of his kind, Joshua and Margaret had no frame of reference for raising a human child. While Jake and Jermaine had been able to run on all fours and catch a ball in their mouths at six months, Finn just lay in his crib pooping his diaper. Margaret had worried that the baby had learning disabilities. What they didn't realise was Finn was fine, it's just that humans don't mature as quickly as dogs. Finn soon caught up, but could shake the 'Cry Baby' thing, and his need to 'toughen up'. He wanted his dad Joshua to be proud of him and se his heroic potential. Now he had to prove that to Jake, by not calling him. He put the mobile phone down. A tear was cutting through the dirt on his cheek. Finn scuttled into the bathroom to wash before Beemo figured out he had been crying.


	2. Chapter 2

Lumps In My Heart By CannibalCupcakes Chapter 2

I will never write porn about Finn. I love him because of his innocence. I don't want to take that away from him. I want his love for LSP to occur naturally and with pure intention. No Rule 34 here. Finn is a child, and a lovely one at that.

Finn busied himself all day with his friends Cinnamon Bun and Starchy in the Candy Kingdom. Princess Bubblegum needed some help shearing up the city gates for an incoming flood. The candy citizens were hauling massive bags of sugar up to the city gates to defend against the oncoming floods of excrement. PB was busy at the Weather Station, with her little gumdrop minions pouring over the meteorological data brought in by the balloon spirits who lived their afterlife in the stratosphere. They had worrying news. No one had predicted a Stuff Storm like this before.  
Peebles pulled her glasses down on her nose as she looked at the printouts.  
'Holy stuff. We need to work double-quick citizens. I've never seen anything like this.' The printer on her computer choked and coughed unhealthily as it spat out the stats.  
The Balloon spirit too was worried. 'I haven't seen a Stuff Storm like this since, well, before I died, no, wait! That's what killed me!'  
PB looked worried. 'I have a plan. I'll send a Banana Guard to go tell Mini Queen to summons her Butt Weevils. After the deluge they will be able to clean up. Until then, we'll just have to keep our heads down.'

Peppermint Butler tumbled out the castle gates to spread the news to Finn, waving his short arms.  
'News from the Princess people!'  
'Hey, PepBut!' Finn called cheerfully, helping Starchy pull a large sugar bolster across the castle entrance to keep the effluent out.  
'The Candy Kingdom has never seen a flood like this in all of Princess Bubblegum's rule. We need to work double quick! The storm comes tonight!'  
'Dude, we're working our butts off, CB downright nearly had a prolapse'  
Cinnamon Bun groaned, rubbing at his love handles in pain.  
'Well Ole' Starchy's still going', Starchy said, wiping the sweat from his moustache, and his little dollymix friends all shouted and jumped up and down ,'Yay, We're nearly done!'  
As Finn and CB pulled candy wrapper covers up over the gates of the castle everyone cheered. 'We're gonna be OK tonight dudes. Tell PB we have it all under wraps.'  
With that, Finn dusted himself down after a job well done, and starting to feel a little tired, started on his way home.

When Finn arrived at the tree house fort, Beemo was waiting for him with a delicious meal of noodles and pizza and a hot drink. Finn hungrily ate, and yawned deeply, before ripping off his clothes, that he dumped on the floor by his bed, donning his onesie, and jumping into his sleeping bag with less than a courtesy to the ever-humble Beemo, went to sleep.

A couple of hours into his rest, Finn's chest began heaving, his heart pounding as his mind was sucked deeply into a twisted evil dream.

He saw the Lich, twisting his deformed and rotting putrid body from the portal again wearing the flayed skin of a human boy, blood drips from his jaws as he vomits, his shoulders heaving and shaking, up comes internal organs, his stomach, inside out lungs, a heart still beating, tiny maggots, green worms screaming, screaming through the dense red blood vapour, WaWaWAWah! Feeling himself evaporate into the blood mist, a heady smell of iron and death and feeling a rhythmic vibration and a sound...

It sounded like Jake's singing...  
On a tropical island...  
The scene shifts...  
Jake's there...

Doing a shimmy in a grass skirt and coconuts on his breasts...  
Playing a ukulele, The Lich evaporates in a puff of green smoke and blood vapour.

The song continues, Finn's eyes snap into focus.  
It's the mobile phone beside his bed. It's vibrating, shivering across the wood.  
Finn grabs at it and flicks the clamshell open.  
It feels cold and solid in his hand as he brings it up to his ear.

'Hey' said Finn, blearily, still half in hypnogogic sleep. His mind is still fogged by worms and the metallic taste of tangy blood mist. He can't tell the dream from reality.

'Finn!, Oh my Glob! Finn, Help meeee!'  
Finn recognised the masculine valley girl accent instantly, and snapped back to full consciousness. 'Oh Glob, Save me Finn! I can't aaarrrghh...'

Finn's heart jolts.  
'LSP! Hang on, I'll save you!'  
He rolls over and falls out of bed, hitting the floor hard and scrambling from his sleeping bag. The phone goes dead. 'LSP! LSP!'  
Finn tries to redial.  
No signal.  
And again. No signal.  
Damn you No signal.

Hastily, Finn threw some provisions in his backpack, clean water, candy bars for energy, rope and grabbed his trusty demon blood sword, pulled on his little blue shorts and T Shirt, his boots and awesome hat, and ran out of the door of the tree fort as fast as his skinny little noodle legs would carry him.  
'Beemo, I've gotta go save LSP!'


	3. Chapter 3

Lumps in my Heart Chapter 3 By Cannibal Cupcakes

This chapter will introduce LSP as a vulnerable young lady, Finn is a hero with a sensitive heart... Why no Flame Princess? Well, it is just a story...

Finn pounded into the dark, the uric acid rain stinging his cheeks and blinding his eyes, thunderclouds clapped overhead, illuminating the fields with and eerie light, where monsters and ghosts haunted the neitherworld. The cold air he brought in to his tight chest in heavy pants burned his lungs with a salty acrid taste, he felt sick to the pit of his stomach, gasping and running blindly.  
Finn kept on running, though by now the mud and slush was up around his thin ankles, kept running his eyes tight shut into the wilds.

He knew where Lumpy Space Princess lived. Ever since her falling out with her haughty parents she had been slumming it as a tramp in the woods to the east of the grasslands. Finn understood LSP, her parents were royalty, and they wouldn't ever let her just be herself, hang loose with her mates and dance and have fun with other lumpy girls her age.

The sounds around him gave him goose bumps, there were eerie calls of terrified animals in the forest, and cries of frogs and salamanders, who, despite being used to the rain were unused to the sulphurous tang of the water poisoning their swamps.  
Finn used his demon blood sword to clear the fallen branches and undergrowth as he pressed on further into the unforgiving night, lightning still sending out forked spears over head, the tortured cry of a distressed fox echoing in his ears. Finn felt bad, he wanted to help it, and all the animals, and to be a hero, but he had to stay with the mission at hand, though every cry burned his soul just as the lightning flashes burned his retinas.

Thunder shook the ground like a monster belching. Finn had heard lots of belching monsters and that really was how they sound. The storm was close, and the bitter north wind blew down from the Ice Kingdom, slapping Finn's face with stinging branches, Finn winced, grateful for his awesome hat in this cold, and wiped at his streaming eyes, not knowing if he was crying or not, noticing a tang of blood in his mouth from a cut lip he hadn't noticed and wondering in his subconscious what it would be like to be a vampire. The thought soon fled with the next crash and lighting flash, when a tree fell in front of him, jerking his reflexes into action, tight and wired, and a howl from his throat. Finn's feet were sinking in the mud, now almost to his knees, as he tried to get a grip on the trunk, it was an old tree, like a giant redwood, with a girth nearly as wide as Finn was tall, he clawed at it and scrambled up on top, surveying the view deep into the forest. Then he sank to his knees breathing deeply, to gain his composure, before he sprang off of it again, landing knee deep in the effluent, and willing his body onwards.

The water was getting deeper now, and he could feel a current. He could feel there was something in the water brushing slimily against his bare knees, looking down and forcing his eyes to focus he saw fish, some swimming in vain against the current, their arms and fins crawling through the thick, sticky acrid water, those with legs wading, little shrieks coming from their tiny fishy mouths. A river must have overflowed, thought Finn, and sure enough, there were water lilies and reeds about his waist. Finn hacked into them blindly with his sword, clearing a path for himself, as he felt the icy sting of hailstones of his thin bare arms, and his fingers freezing to the bone until he couldn't feel them.  
'LSP,' he said under his breath. 'Where are you?'  
He knew he was near. He shrugged his backpack off and fumbled inside for his phone. Finding it amongst his provisions, now ruined by the hail of urine, he flipped it open and pressed redial, hoping for the reassurance of LSP's deep voice on the other end. It didn't happen. The battery was failing, with just one red bar, and the rain had seeped in, fogging up the screen, with no warning the phone died. Finn let it slip from his hand, and bubble into the brown abyss below.

With a lump in his throat, Finn called out at the top of his voice.  
'LSP! LSP! It's me Finn!'  
His voice seemed so alone.  
'Hello! LSP?'  
He called again, wading out into the river.  
'LSP? Lumpy Space Princess!?'  
No answer. He waded further still calling, his high strained voice cracking as he screamed out.  
'LSP!, It's me! It's Finn!' tears were in his eyes again. 'I've come to save you'.

Finn made it to where Lumpy Space Princess had been camping since she ran away, the place she felt at home and had her freedom. There were baked bean cans floating in the water, and some soggy supermarket bags that she used as dresses. There was her blue purse, her piggy mug and remnants of her belongings scattered by the storm all around, but no sign of LSP. Finn sighed deeply, sinking slightly and resting his hands on his knees for support. A clump of hair had found its way out of his hat, slapping his face and making his eyes sting even more, he pushed it back, wiping at his streaming eyes with the back of his hand. Then he heard something coming from under a fallen tree.

'Oh my Glob, Finn.'  
The usually bombastic mannish voice sounded weak and resigned.  
Finn instantly brightened, before noticing the familiar voice came from under a falling tree. The branches had covered her sleeping bag on her makeshift bed, pinning her to the ground. 'LSP! Oh Glob, are you OK?'  
LSP let out a pained groan.  
'I'll get you out of there.'  
Finn began to chop away at the creaking branches with his trusty sword to free the princess, but they were thick and did not cut easily. He decided to try to pull the tree off of her. Finn was very strong for his age and size, and within minutes he could see the shivering lilac body lying in the mud, panting deeply and praying to Glob.  
'Take my hand, LSP, I can pull you out now!' Finn reached down to her, and she reached a freezing lilac hand to his, but they missed by inches.

'Can you float LSP?'  
'I don't know, I don't feel so good,' she sighed, her body shuddering.  
Thunder clapped overhead and brought a fresh wave of hailstones, now getting bigger and more violent. As they hit Finn repeatedly, taking his breath, they began to hurt.  
Then they began to hurt a lot.  
Then he realised they weren't hailstones at all. It was the Stuff.  
LSP's eyes were closed and her lilac lumps were covered in cuts and bruises, the little golden star on her forehead was beginning to grow dim as her breath became shallow. Finn's heroic heart stopped for a second as the threat of the princess's death reared its ugly head inside his mind. He had to get her out of there. Failure was not an option.

Clambering over the debris and branches, and flinching from the bruising hail of the Stuff, he hauled up LSP's limp body using brute force, straining every sinew, surprised at her dead weight. LSP always made floating look effortless, like all lumpy space people, she was arrogant about her floating skills, proud and bombastic. The body Finn pulled out of the mud just looked sad and close to death.

Dropping on to his haunches, he shielded her body with his against the storm, whilst he fumbled in his backpack for a sweater. Everything was wet with uric acid. He tipped the contents out with disgust. Nothing there of use anymore, squished sandwiches, a few crumbling biscuits and a water bottle whose lid had not been screwed on properly, and his yellow sweater a soggy mush. Finn hissed through his teeth. Had he failed? Globdarn it.  
'Stay with me LSP'.  
The princess's breath was now hardly visible, and her star jewel on her forehead had ceased to glow.  
Finn picked her up in his arms and clasped her body tightly to his chest, giving her his warmth, willing her with all his heart to wake up. 'No. No. LSP...Stay awake. Stay awake' His voice trailed away.  
He was breathing heavily, she wasn't breathing at all.

His voice shrieked out in the darkness.  
'NOOOO!'


End file.
